Merry NASCAR Christmas
Merry Christmas, NASCAR fans! I’m going to take a couple of days off to spend some time with my family, but thought I would leave you with the following classic NASCAR Christmas story (although I’m not sure of it’s origin, I found it at BigandBubba.com…if you know it’s original author, let me know in the comments below so they can get the proper credit!)
So have a happy holiday and travel safely if you are going somewhere!
A NASCAR CHRISTMAS…..
Twas the Race before Christmas and all through the track
Each driver was ready to make his attack.
The tires had been stacked by the pit crew with careWith hopes none of them would run out of air.
The drivers were belted all snug in their seatsWhere visions of checkered flags looked mighty sweet.
When out of the infield there rose such a clatter
The crowd sprang to their feet to see what was the matter.
What sight met their wondering eyes as they rose
Twas Rusty Wallace punching somebody’s nose.With eyes like the eagles the spotters they came
And they turned on their headsets and called them by name
“On Spencer! On Petty! On Rudd and Jarrett! “On Cope! On Speed! On Ward and Jeff Burton! At the top of the curve ran ‘em into the wall!Now gentlemen, start your engines all!”
More rapid than lightning the Iceman they flew
With a sack full of cash and the Winston Cup too.
And then in a twinkling there came to the front
The bright rainbow colors of Gordon’s DuPont.Then Bobby Labonte flew by in a flash
While Martin had a breakdown and Spencer a crash.
Then all at once with a rush and a roarThere came a new car they had not seen before.
From bumper to bumper it was painted all red
North Pole Toy Co.was the sponsor they read.
With a little old driver so lively and quick
They all said at once, “Hey, this must be a trick!”“A geezer like that shouldn’t be driving here!”
“And why does his pit crew all have pointed ears?”
The next scheduled pit stop went kinda slow
For the old fellow stopped at each pit in the row.He spent no time at all, but left gas and oil
A new set of tires, new tools for their toil.
He asked no endorsement, demanded no fee
And left only coal for the black #3.Childress got on the com and said “Hey Intimidator …
Want to chew him up now, or save him for later?”
Dale spoke not a word, but went straight to his work
He gave him a nudge, then broadsided the jerk.But the old guy escaped with a zig and a zag
And crossed over the finish line, right at the flag.
The old man drove straight up to victory lane
Grabbed up the trophy and drank some champagne.Thanked all his sponsors and took the cash too
Stole a kiss from Brooke Gordon, and then off he flew
As he sped out of sight, one last cry did they hear.
“Merry Christmas to all, better luck next year!”
October 22nd, 2009 at 2:19 pm
Someone asked me why women don’t gamble as much as men do, and I gave the commonsensical reply that we don’t have as much money. That was a true and incomplete answer. In fact, women’s total instinct for gambling is satisfied by marriage.
November 2nd, 2009 at 8:14 pm
I have numerous troubles with my web browser I-comm on your web site. The monkeys are in the system :-(.
December 4th, 2009 at 4:26 pm
Okay, thanks. That was fast, by the way.